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12 Stupid Things That Mess Up Recovery

June 26, 2012 By David Palmer

Dr. Allen Berger
$14.95
Hazelden Publishing

 

Four out of five newcomers to Alcoholics Anonymous relapse during the first year of their recovery, according to author Allen Berger, and he believes we can improve the odds by going beyond the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous and into the realm of psychotherapy.

There is much more to solving our addiction problems than putting the cork in the bottle, says Berger, himself a psychotherapist and recovering drug addict in “12 Stupid Things That Mess Up Recovery,” a dandy little manual on recovery.

An enthusiastic supporter of Alcoholics Anonymous, Berger says that “while the steps offer an incredible formula for change, we have to do the work.” And by work Berger includes dealing with the emotional baggage that contributes to dysfunctional relationships and subverts recovery.

Support for his claim, he says, begins with AA co-founder Bill Wilson who suffered from depression and wrote a letter to a friend, similarly afflicted, that was printed in a 1958 issue of AA’s Grapevine publication about the need for “maintaining emotional balance” in our lives.

Most addicts, Berger says, have experienced more emotional problems growing up than the average. Beyond that, he says, substance abuse often produces changes in the brain that are irreversible particularly in the areas of abstract thinking and problem solving.

“Once the brain has been changed,” Berger says, “it has been changed forever.”

That said, Berger emphasizes, again referring to Wilson, we must still deal with the alcohol or other drug problem before tackling emotional problems. We must begin with working the steps, getting a sponsor and going to meetings.

“If we use therapy to avoid working the steps,” Berger maintains, “then we are using therapy to help sabotage recovery.”

A list of the “12 stupid things that mess up recovery” is included as a sidebar to this review, and each one merits a chapter in the book. To give you a flavor of the nuggets you will find, here are six quotes that intrigued me:

• “Recovery is an initiation into life. If we stay the course, we will grow up and learn how to take care of ourselves.
• “We do what we do because of who we are, not because of someone else’s behavior. We are responsible for our life … not our mate.”
• “I wanted to be perfect because, in a distorted way, I truly believed that being human wasn’t good enough.”
• “It’s not what they are doing to you, it’s what they are doing.”
• “If we suffer diarrhea we have first hand knowledge of being powerless.”
• “Alcoholism is a symptom that has become pathogenic itself.” (In the beginning the use of alcohol is the solution for a deeper problem. It later becomes the problem.)

Allen Berger is the chief clinical officer of Cumberland Heights in Nashville, Tennessee. He has more than 36 years of clinical experience at all levels of care in the treatment of addiction. Berger, who has a reputation as a no nonsense therapist and inspiring teacher, has authored several professional publications and his last book was “Love Secrets-Revealed.”

Filed Under: Recovery

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